Posts Tagged ‘funny’


Battle of the Brands: Angelina Jolie vs Bacon

Friday, July 30th, 2010

Angelina Jolie and Bacon. Both loved by many for many reasons, and disliked by few for few reasons. Which has more guts? Which has more glory? Which is the stronger contender?  The only way to tell is with…


Battle of the Brands!!
Using only the thousands of social media opinions generated by their fans as their weapons, we have analyzed, samplized, sentimentalyzed, and contentalyzed them. The person to win the most of 7 matches will be declared the victor. Let us begin.
The Cool Factor: Who wins the battle of hip, cool, and fashionable?
Angelina: 39% of conversations talking about the cool factor say that Angelina has it. But, another 5% say she doesn’t.
Bacon: 19% of conversations put bacon on the cool list. Oh, sorry bacon!
Advertising: Who has the best advertising campaigns?
Angelina: 30% of opinions are in favor of her advertising.
Bacon: 50% of opinions are in favor of bacon advertising. Mmmm, drooling at the photo…
Emotions: Who makes peoples knees sink with eternal, undying love?
Angelina: 35% of emotions towards Angelina are positive
Bacon: 31% of emotions towards bacon are positive. So close, it’s pretty much a tie right now!
Anticipation: Who makes us wait desperately for more, MORE, MORE!
Angelina: 39% of opinions are desperately wanting more.
Bacon: 35% of opinions are wanting more. Again, it’s a tie, but bacon is trailing oh so slightly both times…
Shape: Who is more shapely?
Angelina: 39% of opinions like the shape of this fine, lookin’ lady.
Bacon: 16% of opinions like the shape of bacon. But really, who are these people who care about the shape of bacon?
Breakfast: Who would you like to have for breakfast?
Angelina: 67% of opinions towards having Angelina over for breakfast are positive. Wow, how can bacon beat this?
Bacon: 26% of opinions are in favor of a bacon breakfast.
Yummy: Who’s the yummiest?
Angelina: 67% positive is a huge score to beat and bacon really needs this one.
Bacon: 43% positive is a good score but it just won’t cut it in this war.

Well, with a score of 4 to 1, and 2 ties, … the winner is Angelina!

Sorry bacon, but you’ll just have to sizzle in the oven a little longer if you want to beat Angelina.